Read this, then we'll talk.
Wasn't that a good blog?
After years growing up, just waiting to get out and start my life, to the super-fun years at college, to the all-important years of mothering, I'm now spending a lot of time wondering if I'm up to it. I love my family--I'm extremely blessed, and I know it. But doing the dishes? And doing them everyday? Potty training? Cooking everyday? I know these things are important, but feeling their importance is another thing. And we all know how women like to feel things. Sometimes I think that if I could just do something really well--like gourmet dinners every night or perfectly behaved kids--then it would be worthwhile. If I was actually good at disciplining or potty training, then doing these things would have more meaning. But doing things that I don't feel particularly good at, day in and day out, can be very tiring.
Yesterday at church a speaker mentioned something about the love she felt for her children. My mind jumped topics completely to the Visiting Teaching messages from a few years back (probably the last year I diligently did my visiting teaching) on feeling the love of the Lord in various ways. I struggle day to day feeling the importance of what I do and feeling that with all my faults, the Lord still loves me. What the speaker helped me do was connect the love I feel for my children with the love my Heavenly Father might feel for me--in greater proportion. He has blessed me with a greater capacity to love them than I thought I had--and I think its because of His great love for all his children. With all my frustrations with my kids, I still love them, very much. How much more so might our Heavenly Father feel for His children, even with all their faults? I think part of the gift of motherhood is this great gift of love.
Maybe if I remembered this more often, I could do a little better from day to day.